Netflix and schill


  • An awesome weekend hosted by House of War in Ringwood
  • Organised by the fine Gentlemen of the Red Jokers Podcast
  • Attended by some of the friendliest, loosest and all-round good folk of the Malifaux community
  • 1st – Nick Beattie, 2nd – Phil Cottrel, 3rd – Luke Henry
  • Smashed beers, regretted my decision to smash beers on Sunday
  • When I made it home it was Panadol>glass of eno> fetal position> watching fireman Sam


Game 1 – Corie Leslie (ten thunders)

This was a grudge match.  I had completely forgotten Corey from our first meeting at the same venue for a different Malifaux tourney.
Fortunately Corey  is a champ of a man and is a very friendly fellow whilst he hands me kicks my ass all around the table
things of note… summoned a punk Zombie on a 7 of crows… what a cheating prick I am, fortunately it did nothing and had no impact, I learnt from that error.

Game 2 – Byron T Bornhorst – Yanlo

Things of note, I won.  we both flipped red jokers for turn 2 initiative.  It was Lolz!
Both of us took Toshiro, and of course we had a duel epic stylez mid board.  I have no memory of the result of that match up.  I know a “whispers from beyond-ed” YanLo , so he ran and hid like a bitch.

Game 3 – Adam Irwin – Outcasts Vicki’s

Things of note, Dead Doxie is cool. I was generally outplayed. The Vickis hurt.

Game 4 – Leigh Caruana – McMourning

Things of note Mcmourning managed to get in range of Nicodem, hit Nico with his scalpel fling attack, I flipped a 1 of rams for defence, I was blissfully unaware of what kind of pain I was inviting by not cheating that higher.  He pounded Nico HARD.

I felt it was a tight game, but in the end another losss.  By this time I think I was getting the hang of Nico and some strategy.

I had been having a brain fart and thinking I needed the SPECIFIC number to summon what ever it was I wanted to summon, not thinking that if I had a 12 I could summon anything from the list below it….. I suppose that’s what practice games are for..


Game 5 – Jomane Reva

It was awesome to finsih this day and event playing with Jomane.  We both were drained, so it was cool to be able to have a casual session just like the garage games we play.  I completely flubbed the scheme selections, aparently there was something significant about the pool… I dunno.  Things I remeber from this point were that I summoned a second hanged and  made him use his own ( what a jerk I am).  killed Reva with a Necropunk, I’d put a pound of hurt on her with a Punk zombie previously… I was well behind and this was just for the moral victory really.

After tourney on Saturday;

Overall all my opponents were wonderful people to play with, I felt bad that I stuff up a fair few rules and had some poor card etiquette in a game or 2, also not having a solid grasp of the rules meant badgering the  more knowledgeable players near me.

Once the tourney was complete, it was relax, drink, eat and game some more.  It was during this time I was involved in a conversation about how people wipe their asses.  turns out it isn’t as universal as I’d thought and that some folk have some weird ways.

mind blown NDT.gif

Still I think about it.

I often stop, as I have lifted my nuts and go for the reach under and think, how did I come to do it this way?  I don’t have a memory of anyone showing me…. this is just the most effective way I have come up with.  others allegedly shift to the side and reach under for a wipe.

I’ve tried it. It’s weird and I don’t know why you would. It feels unnatural.
sedated nuh.gif

Other games played were ticket to ride, Gore Chosen and The Dead of winter.

I didn’t play ticket top ride, but I heard it was fun.

I’ve played Gorechosen once and that was a lot of fun!, looked like it stood up to a greater community consensus of enjoyment by others that night.
( I should write something up about that, as we played a 3 way. Me and me mate went tag team without remorse on another. it was lush)

I’d brought The Dead of Winter, and ran through 2 games of that with a decent group of people.  It’s 5 player however there were so many interested a few folk doubled up.  First game was chalked up as a win! good times! ( I’ve played this game multiple times and rarely get a win) > It could easily have been a loss.  We’d had maybe 1 round left, and had met the objective, we just had to survive until the “check objective” step to claim Victory.

Along comes loose unit “Gentile”…..


He’d picked up the crossroads which had cops offer a cache of guns if the survivors could keep the area clear, this meant he’d be able to pull 8 cards from the Police station and keep all the guns found, however it added to our victory conditions: keep 3 other locations free of zombies.

At this time there were Zombies EVERYFUCKINGWHERE!

with that charming fuck off smile old mate Gentile just starts drawing from the police station deck.

ash evil dead grin.gif

 The rest of the survivors erupted! chaos! Chaos!  ….. you couldn’t argue with his logic though… ” but guns?!”.  Fortunately we talked him back from the ledge, and we chalked up a win.

In that same fateful game we uncovered a game breaking glitch.

“Sexy Fireman”





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